Incompatible
by Robin Red R
Summary: Ancient Egypt, stolen tablets, and Jaime stumbling upon the Lord of Chaos during a team mission. Crack-pairing: Klarion/Blue Beetle. And the Scarab interferes. Slash.


**Title: **Incompatible

**Rating: **T

**Warning: **Slash (boyxboy), language, suggestive themes. And cracky-ness.

**Summary: ** Ancient Egypt, stolen tablets, and Jaime stumbling upon the Lord of Chaos during a team mission. Crack-pairing: Klarion/Blue Beetle. And the Scarab interferes. Slash.

**Author's Note: **Thank you to the lovely Rose Hunter for giving me this idea, and for beta-ing! Klarion needs more love… so lemme crack-ship him with Jaime. First time writing something non-Wally/Dick or Season One related. Anyway, hope you enjoy! ^^ Don't forget to review please.

**Please Read:** 'Underlined' is the Scarab talking, _italics with no quotations _are through M'gann's mental connection, and _"Italics with double quotations" _are through the com-link. Random italics in the middle of sentences signify Spanish words that Jaime or the Scarab interjects in English sentences, _entiendes__? _XD

**Disclaimer: **Nothing is mine.

* * *

**Incompatible**

**~x~**

_{El Paso, Texas,_

_July 15__th__, 17:15 MST}_

Jaime lounged on the olive green couch in his living room, a book in his hand. He flipped lazily through the paper-back novel, before stretching his arms above his head and yawning. Summer reading could be _so_ boring sometimes. Glancing back down at the page, he realized he had just re-read the same paragraph three times without any of it sinking in.

'It appears your intake of information is being affected by your minor level of interest and loss of focus'_,_ the scarab told him matter-of-factly. Sticking in his bookmark to mark the page, Jaime set the book down on the coffee table with a sigh.

"Yeah, you can say that again," he answered out loud, yawning for a second time.

'… It appears your intake of information is being affected_—__' _the Scarab started to repeat uncertainly.

"No, I didn't mean literally!" Jaime laughed. "It's an expression." The Scarab fell silent, which Jaime took to mean he was embarrassed. Grinning to himself, he looked around for something new to do. His parents were busy in his dad's garage in the middle of a heated discussion (that he didn't particularly want to join in on), his book had just reached another level of boring, and there was nothing on TV except a news report about a museum robbery… leaving him at a loss of what to do. Having all his friends away on summer vacation didn't help matters. And, no offense to his scarab, but Khaji Da wasn't exactly the best of company either. **[1]**

'Right back at you, _chico_' the scarab said half-hurt, half-sarcastic and Jaime almost felt bad. Almost.

Thankfully, luck seemed to be on his side when his built-in communicator buzzed, signaling a team-member contacting him.

"Yeah?" he said expectantly into the mouthpiece.

"_Nightwing to Blue Beetle. Are you busy? I have a mission for the team if you're free this evening."_

"_Si, si,_ I'm totally free! When should I be there?" Jaime replied enthusiastically, jumping up from the couch.

"_As soon as you can, actually. I'm getting the rest of the team assembled. Nightwing out." _The com-link hummed then was still as the team leader broke the connection. Jaime rubbed his hands together, letting the scarab transform him into his Blue Beetle form. He quickly scribbled a note to his parents saying he'd be out until tomorrow probably, signed it "B.B." so they'd know why, and then jumped out the window gracefully.

All was quiet except for the low buzz of his wings beating faster than the eye could see propelling him towards the abandoned telephone-booth that was the secret zeta-beamer to Mount Justice. He wondered idly what the mission could be this time. Checking his surroundings quickly to make sure no one was watching, Jaime stepped in and closed the door carefully behind him.

* * *

_{Mount Justice,_

_July 15th, 18:27 EDT}_

'**Recognized: Blue Beetle B-22' **The zeta-tube's voice announced his presence to the cave.

"Hey Blue!" Garfield greeted him ardently, waving a green hand from the couch. Jaime looked around, seeing most of the team already gathered in the mission room. In fact, they were all there except for Miss Martian, with Nightwing nowhere in sight. He smiled at Beast Boy, tuning vaguely in to his animated conversation with a rather lost looking Robin about the lifestyle of the hummingbird.

'Body scanner indicates a sub-par level of bodily-fluids. I suggest taking a drink,' the scarab broke into his thoughts.

"Jeeze, you could just tell me I'm thirsty, no need to go all science geeky on me…" Jaime mumbled to himself, low enough that no one else could hear. However, he could feel Superboy's eyes on his back as he padded into the kitchen, reminding him that the clone did have super hearing. Thankfully, he'd already trusted Connor with his secret several months ago, so he had nothing to fear.

Just to spite the scarab (who had insisted several times that water was the only acceptable and healthy drink for him to consume), Jaime filled up a glass full of pineapple juice. Before it could comment with more than a displeased grunt, Nightwing entered from the control room, along with Miss Martian and… the league member Zatanna. Jaime pricked his ears as the conversation in the room abruptly came to a halt, all attention focusing on the three.

"Alright, hello team," Nightwing greeted them. "Sorry for the impromptu call, but there's a rather important mission I've assigned to you tonight." He turned to the control panels in the center of the room, pulling up a few holographic displays. The first ones showed what seemed to be a collection of ancient artifacts; chipped blocks inscribed with what looked like runes, or hieroglyphs. The team crowded closer to the screens as Nightwing continued his explanation.

"Over the last few weeks, several relics such as these have been stolen from museums around the world. It's probable that they are not a coincidence."

"What's so special about a bunch of old pottery shards?" Lagoon Boy cut in, looking bored. Nightwing eyed him with a level gaze, obviously not pleased with the interruption.

"These are artifacts with great cultural importance to the people of Ancient Egypt, and are not just 'old pottery shards'." The team looked up in surprise. "They date from around 2700 to 2500 BC," here Nightwing paused imperceptibly, realizing that those dates probably did not mean anything to his younger teammates, and so added; "Right during the time of the Great Pyramids. They were believed to have the power to bring back the dead… if properly assembled. It was assumed this was just legend, but under the circumstances it would be wise to investigate." He went still for a moment, eyeing the blue-tinted holographic image before him.

"Doctor Fate has recently detected a spike of magical forces right here," he waved a gloved hand, pulling up a map of northern Africa and pointing to the red dot that was marked there. "In Faiyum, the oldest city in all of Egypt," the team leader elaborated.

He nodded to Zatanna who had stood quietly to the side while he spoke. "We have reason to believe that our culprit might be Klarion the Witchboy." An inaudible ripple ran through the team at those words, making even Lagoon Boy frown. They'd all heard the stories about the Lord of Chaos: the former Kid Flash relinquishing his body temporarily to Doctor Fate in order to defeat him, the time he had managed to send all adults and children into separate dimensions, not to mention him taking part in the grand scheme of infecting the Justice League with the Starro-tech. Of course it wasn't to be forgotten that he was also a member of The Light; the current greatest enemy of the Justice League.

"What could be more chaotic than bringing back the dead?" Batgirl said rhetorically, crossing her arms across her chest, and several members of the team nodded. Jaime had been watching attentively from the back of the group, absentmindedly sipping his glass of juice. A mixture of excitement and apprehension formed in the pit of his stomach; eagerness for the new mission, and uneasiness about the foe they would be going up against. Klarion was, after all, a super-villain. All of these thoughts flew out of his head, however, as Nightwing pressed a button pulling up a headshot of the Lord of Chaos himself.

"Whoa wait, t-that's Klarion?!" Jaime spluttered, choking ungainly on his pineapple juice. The team turned to look at him in bewilderment. He turned bright red, totally due to him choking… not for other reasons.

"Are you alright?" M'gann asked, eyeing him worriedly. Under other circumstances he would have been surprised to see the usually stoic Martian showing concern for anyone other than her fish-boyfriend, but right now he had other things on his mind.

"_Si_ _senorita_, sorry…" Jaime answered, dispelling the last of the offending juice from his lungs. "I just… uh, got surprised…" Damn well he did. He had no clue the psychopathic Witchboy would be so… good looking. _Did I seriously just think that? _Jaime recoiled from his own thoughts. However, he couldn't keep his eyes away from that intense dark gaze of the projected image, the black eyes seeming to stare right through him despite the insubstantiality of the hologram. He marveled at the way his ebony hair framed his angular face, rising up into two spikes on his head to mimic the silhouette of a devil.

He tore his eyes from the image of Klarion when he realized the team was still shooting him strange looks.

'Your current behavior is slightly worrisome to your team members,' the scarab pointed out, but Jaime refrained from answering. Nightwing sighed, shutting down the holographic display and turning to face the team full-on.

"Anyway," he dragged the word out to gather everyone's attention again. "The last time we met Klarion we were inexperienced and unprepared. For this reason, you'll be divided into three squads, each led by one of the founding members of the team. Superboy, Miss Martian, and Zatanna have all gone up against Klarion before; they will be able to help you should you come across any difficulties. Hopefully a super-villain like him isn't even part of this mess, but it's best to be prepared."

"Your job tonight is to see whether the sudden magic usage in the area has anything to do with the stolen tablets, and if it does_, _to try and find out who is behind it all. Remember; you're a covert team. Don't get involved in anything dangerous if at all possible. Zatanna will be joining Alpha squad with Lagoon Boy and Robin for this mission. Superboy, Beast Boy, Blue Beetle and Wondergirl will take up Beta squad; you'll go in after Alpha has cleared the path of any potential magic-based hindernesses. Miss Martian, Bumblebee and Batgirl, you'll be Gamma Squad and stay in the Bioship as a backup and stakeout. I'll keep watch with Mal from the base and do my own research on the tablets. Clear?" Nightwing rattled off their instructions precisely and without pause, but Jaime was barely listening. His mind was otherwise occupied, despite the scolding from the scarab.

'How are you supposed to do well on this mission if you're not paying attention to the instructions? Stop thinking about the Witchboy… I'm not going to remember your instructions for you.' 

"Sweet! I'm on Alpha!" Lagoon boy shouted eagerly, breaking the slight silence that had followed Nightwing's orders.

"Everyone get dressed, I'm sending you the coordinates. Miss Martian? Get the bioship ready."

"Yes, Nightwing." The team dispersed quickly to their respective rooms, the atmosphere immediately turning into the familiar barely suppressed excitement and tension that it always did before missions. Blue Beetle followed slowly, still lost in thought.

* * *

_{Faiyum, Egypt_

_July 16__th__, 05:16 EET}_

Jaime hated time differences. It was kind of disturbing to jerk out of his daydream, look out the panoramic window of the Bioship and see the sun rising over the wind-swept dunes of the Sahara, while his internal clock told him it should be eleven at night. But that wasn't the important thing right now. Four hours after leaving Happy Harbor, the high-speed Martian aircraft had transported them halfway across the world, and they were now five minutes from landing in Faiyum.

_Establishing mental connection. Everyone there? _M'gann's voice echoed in his head. Jaime added his voice to the chorus of 'yes's that followed her inquiry. _Putting Bioship into camouflage mode. _

And so the mission began, simple enough as it always started. Zatanna detected a magical force field surrounding the abandoned temple which was their target, but with a few choice spells she made a hole big enough for the Bioship to enter through inconspicuously.

"I think… there might be sensors around here to pick up on radio waves," she mused out loud, staring out the semi-circled window of the aircraft. "We should probably keep radio silence just to be on the safe side. There's always Miss Martian's telepathic connection so don't worry." Jaime frowned. As helpful as M'gann's telepathy was, it always stressed him out. It was bad enough having more than two voices in his head, but the mental energy it took to keep M'gann and the team from hearing the Scarab when they spoke to him tired him out.

In stealth-mode, the team split up into their separate squads and approached the abandoned temple from different sides. Well, 'abandoned' was a _slight_ exaggeration. The place was practically teeming with heavily armed guards. Beta squad dropped down through the open air vents, looking around carefully in the near-darkness, the only sound being the regular tap-tap of the guard's shoes on the tile floor below them. Unfortunately, they hadn't gotten all too far in before someone was spotted. Jaime wasn't sure who, but he didn't have time to worry as gunfire exploded on all sides of them.

Superboy growled inarticulately behind him, charging forward out of the darkness and sending the nearest guards flying with a single swipe of his arm.

"_Covert_ anybody?" Jaime hissed to no one in particular, darting behind a wooden crate to avoid the bullets raining down on them. No way was this kind of an entrance going to go unnoticed.

'Activating plasma canon,' the scarab announced, and Blue Beetle shot back at a few of the nearest guards, sending them tumbling backwards from the blast. He looked around quickly to see how the rest of his team was doing, but they were pretty much invisible in the swirling dust thrown up from the scuffling.

_Beta Squad? What's going on? _Robin from Alpha asked worriedly through M'gann's mental link.

_M'gann! _Shrieked Bumblebee suddenly. The building around them shook as something exploded nearby, sending wooden crates flying. Dust falling thickly from the ceiling blocked Jaime's view even more, and clogged up his breathing. At that same moment, Superboy punched a guard in the chest, sending him flying backwards and smack into the wall behind Jaime.

'Move! The room is going to collapse from structural damage!' the scarab called, and Jaime didn't need to be told twice as he blasted a hole straight through the wall in response. He jumped through it seconds before everything crumbled around him. Damn these old temples that couldn't withstand anything. He sincerely hoped the rest of his team had been out of the danger zone when the room collapsed, but with the dust he hadn't been able to see a thing. Heaving for breath, Jaime stepped back from the broken wall and looked around warily.

He found himself in a quiet hallway, dimly lit except for some almost burned down oil lamps, set at intervals down the corridor. It smelled old and musty, with a kind of dampness in the air that made his skin crawl. The thudding and cries from the battle were oddly muffled here, considering the walls couldn't be all that soundproof. Suddenly, he heard the faint tap of shoes on the tiled floor, approaching from around a bend in the hallway. He glanced around fearfully, and then slipped into a little alcove in the wall, hoping he'd be out of sight.

"Look Teekl, the armadillos are trying to meddle again," sneered a high-pitched, grating voice. Jaime bit his lip nervously. If that voice didn't just scream "villain"… The footsteps paused a dozen feet from him, and Jaime held his breath. All he could see from his current position though was the flickering light from the oil lamps on the wall opposite him. Suddenly, a strange force seemed to grab ahold of him, yanking him violently out of his hiding place so he landed sprawling on the floor. He scrambled quickly to his feet, freezing in shock when he beheld his attacker.

He should have known. Bad luck just had to be on his side today, didn't it? Klarion the Witchboy stood before him, all the more fascinating now that Jaime could see him in person. Dressed in his usual suit-jacket and tie, with the distinctive flared cuffs and the devil horned haircut standing out sharply against the yellow glow of the lamps behind him, he was unmistakable. One of his black-nailed hands was still raised, presumably after having cast the spell that had dragged Jaime to the floor a moment ago.

"What do we have here?" Klarion dropped the hand to stroke the head of a ginger cat that lay draped over his shoulders like a shawl. He then took a confident step towards Jaime who still stood frozen in the middle of the hallway. The picture on Nightwing's holographic display did _not _do this guy justice. What the image hadn't captured were the little things; like the glint in the depths of his dark black eyes, or the way the firelight played across his features creating shadows where there should be none, or the smooth confident ease with which he walked forward, stroking his cat absentmindedly all the while.

'What are you waiting for? Eliminate him! Eliminate him before he hurts you!' Jaime could feel the plasma canon turning towards Klarion without his consent, but he forced his will over the scarab's.

"No!" he hissed, grabbing his arm as a restraint with his other hand.

"'No'? What do you mean 'no'?" _Great, now even your _super-villain crush _thinks you're crazy, _he thought to himself bitterly. Klarion took yet another step forward, and Jaime stumbled backwards. The full situation hit him just then. He was alone, blocked off from the rest of his team, and facing one of the most dangerous super-villains of all time. One who also happened to reduce Jaime to a dazed mush whenever he looked at him.

_Miss M? Beta squad? Anyone there? _He said tentatively into the mental connection. But everything was silent, eerily silent. There was no more connection. He remembered the horror-stricken cry from Bumblebee seconds before the explosion. Had something happened to M'gann? Well there went his last hope.

Jaime looked back up into the unnervingly black eyes of Klarion, (he couldn't decide yet which was more unsettling: Klarion's ageless eyes, or the cat's pupil-less red ones), a mixture of fear and exhilaration coursing through him. The Witchboy smirked, stretching out a hand towards him. Panicking, Jaime staggered backwards but his heels were checked by the dry crumbling wall of the corridor, preventing an escape.

The scarab was incessantly yelling at him to move, to shoot, to do _something, _but Jaime had all but tuned him out. He couldn't move, he couldn't shoot, and he couldn't do anything but stand there and stare. Couldn't, and wouldn't.

_Team? _He tried again, but with no hope. The link was down, and Zatanna had told them to keep radio silence. Jaime's eyes flickered to Klarion's familiar as the cat jumped from his shoulders to the ground, sitting down by their feet and curling his tail around his paws. Glancing quickly back up, Jaime noticed that Klarion had a dangerous, predatory look in his eyes now.

"All these voices in your head… it's rather _chaotic,_ isn't it?" he stated conversationally, a hand reaching out to touch Jaime's cheek. His _bare _cheek. Where had his Blue Beetle armor gone, Jaime thought frantically. He shivered as the Witchboy dragged his long nails lightly across his skin, making his breath hitch in his throat. He gulped as Klarion stepped still closer, so close Jaime was almost going cross-eyed to keep him in sight. "However do you keep track of them all?" Klarion breathed, his breath ghosting over Jaime's lips.

'He knows! He must be eliminated!' Jaime didn't have the will power left to stop as the scarab took control, shooting two balls of energy in quick succession out of the plasma canon which had materialized on his arm again. Klarion barely flinched, deflecting them with a casual wave of his hand. With a sudden movement, like a snake striking, he pinned Jaime to the wall with surprising strength for his wiry frame.

"What's wrong… cat got your tongue?" he snickered, shooting a glance to the floor where Teekl sat nonchalantly licking his paws. "Your mission is doomed for failure, and there's nothing you and your cute little team can do to stop me now." He chuckled, his eyes flickering to an insane dark red momentarily. "One last tablet to collect, and I'll have the greatest army in the universe under my control." They stared at each other for a moment. "But… you're different from the others. Perhaps I'll spare you. You intrigue me." He tapped Jaime's forehead with his index finger, smirking manically to himself.

"W-what do you want from me?" stammered Jaime, finally getting his vocal chords to work. He vaguely realized how subdued the scarab had been lately… in fact, he couldn't hear Khaji saying anything. In a way, it was a slight relief not having to fight the scarab's control.

Klarion's smirk just grew wider. "I thought that much was obvious…" he whispered, his fingers intertwining with Jaime's as he pressed him into the wall. The latter tried desperately to keep his erratic heartbeat under control. They both stood still for a moment, bodies pressed lightly together. Klarion felt warm… hot, as if there was a smoldering fire burning inside of him. It made Jaime's stomach flop and his lungs stop working, and it took a surprisingly large amount of self-control to stop himself from reaching out to touch him. Suddenly Teekl hissed, and Klarion's attention was abruptly diverted: Jaime could breathe again.

"Blue! You there?" he heard the familiar voices of Cassie and Garfield calling out loudly, their footsteps echoing in the stone walls of the hallway. Fear for his friends made his throat run dry. He tried to call out a warning, but the Witchboy clamped a hand over his mouth. Klarion's expression darkened and he muttered something about "meddling baby heroes". Suddenly his face contorted in rage, and he sprang away from the stunned Jaime, letting a cold feeling of disappointment seep into the brunet from the loss of contact.

"No! My tablets!" he shouted to the opposite wall, stamping his foot in fury. He spun around angrily to meet Wondergirl, Beast Boy and Superboy as the three squad members rounded the corner, Jaime apparently forgotten. It wasn't like he was going anywhere anyway. His team member's faces were that of shock and surprise upon hearing and seeing Klarion, with an underlying fear for Jamie's own well-being once they spied him slumped against the wall. He smiled weakly at them as a reassurance, but the scowl that Superboy sprouted, directed at Klarion, seemed to speak otherwise.

"Imbeciles! How did you get past my spells? Impossible!" he raged, sending several balls of red fire in all directions. Jaime watched Garfield duck as one shot his way, singing the hair of his head. "Impossible!" Klarion repeated.

Jaime's eyes widened as suddenly Zatanna and her squad stalked in from the other hallway, holding the unconscious body of M'gann. Or, Jaime hoped she was just unconscious. He didn't want to think about the alternative.

"Maybe my 'baby magic' has upgraded since the last time we met, Klarion," Zatanna said coldly in reply. The Witchboy hissed, a sound similar to his cat's, and threw jagged red spikes in her direction. She muttered a spell and held up a blue-tinted transparent shield in front of her. While Beast Boy, in the shape of a green tiger, was having a face-off with a suddenly enormous Teekl, Zatanna and the rest of the present team were fending off the barrage of spells with difficulty. Suddenly, Klarion grabbed his now normal-sized familiar by the tail, and still shouting out obscenities, he vanished into a portal he'd created in the wall. Zatanna lunged forward in an attempt to catch him, but he was too fast. His black eyes connected with Jaime's once, and then he was gone.

There was a moment of silence as the team, breathing haggardly, stared at the blank wall where Klarion had just been a minute ago. Still out of his armor, Jaime clenched his fists, not quite sure how to decipher the emotions running through him currently. He jerked in surprise when he felt something in his hand. Opening his palm, he saw a smooth piece of glossy paper with a seven-digit number imprinted on it in sharp black ink.

"Hey, Blue, you alright? He didn't hurt you did he?" Jaime looked up quickly, seeing Zatanna and Superboy approaching him with concern written on their faces. He pocketed the scrap of paper discreetly, grinning at them.

"Yeah, yeah, _senorita, _I'm fine. You guys came in the nick of time," he lied. Jaime frowned, startled as the scarab suddenly turned him back into his Blue Beetle form. "Uh, guess Klarion just kind of messed with my… tech," he trailed off, not sure how to describe the scarab to Zatanna without giving anything away. He exchanged a glance with Connor, trusting him not to comment.

'Scarab back online,' growled Khaji, obviously peeved. 'Never let him do _that_ again.' Jaime wasn't all too sure what 'that' was, but he wasn't going to ask.

"Well, as long as you're okay now," Zatanna commented, giving him a quick smile and then turning back to take care of M'gann. The Kryptonian gave him a long unreadable look, and then followed Zatanna without a word. Jaime wondered if Connor was more observant than one might think… Maybe he'd have a talk with him later. Maybe. Then Jaime sighed, fingering the slip of paper in his pocket, unaware of the goofy smile making its way onto his face.

'Throw it away,' warned the scarab when the team was safely strapped into the Bioship, on their long way back to Happy Harbor. Miss Martian had regained consciousness, reassuring them that it was only the heat from the explosion that had made her pass out. No one else was injured save for a few scratches, thankfully. 'Your feelings for the Lord of Chaos are unrealistic. Disaster is inevitable. The two of you are most definitively incompati—"

"Oh be quite; you're just jealous," laughed Jaime under his breath. "We're not incompatible, just you wait."

**~x~Fin~x~**

* * *

**[1]: **For those who don't know, "Khaji Da" was the name Jaime's scarab gave himself in the Blue Beetle comics _Infinite Crisis. _I have no idea if the scarab in Young Justice is named (yet), but I'm taking the liberty to assume so.

**Author's Note: **Hope you liked it… and pardon the randomness. I'll get to updating my other fic as well, sorry for the wait! Please check out my poll too: I've redone it so even if you voted before, you can vote again because there are more options ^^


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